Still, the bottom line is that the terrorist cells being clumsily pursued by American and British bombs and troops hate US Imperialism and they hate fun. I'd throw over the imperialism but I'l insist on keeping whatever fun we can still manage to afford. We've arrived at a peculiar point in history where we might be seeing a war between the haves and the have-nots, in which the haves more or less believe in humanist values (massive contradictions, hypocrisies, and colonial advantages duly noted) and the have-nots don't. Stalinism and Maoism prefigured all this, but it emerges into a horrible clarity with the rise of religious fundamentalisms among the have-nots. It's a great time to be neutral!

I used to subscribe to the materialist interpretation of human conflict — that beneath the ideologies, you find competition for resources and territory. I was a jerk. When people are fanatical about their belief in a religion or ideology, they'll even act against their own material interests. This is "idealism," in point of fact, standing in contrast to greedy self-interest. (Hold the phone, Ayn Rand. I'm not joining your rallies either, and I don't feel like unpacking this one right now.) This is why idealism can be so much more dangerous than corrupt power seeking. Idealism can't be paid off. And when an idealism wants to force everybody to share its ideal, it can be implacable.

Trust No One

You may well ask, since I believe the Islamic warrior cells are probably the biggest threat to life and liberty since the German Nazis, why am I neutral? Why don't I support the war?

Well, because I don't trust the Bush Administration to do this in the most humane way possible, and because it might be a really stupid move. I don't trust the Bushies to make the right tactical decisions. In World War II, the allies visited terror on the civilian populations of Dresden, Hiroshima, and Nagasaki. Whether these horrific actions were necessary to bring the war to an end is still debated today, but at least the war did come to an end. There was a nation state on the receiving end that could be brought to surrender. This is different. It isn't really a war. It's a situation. And it's a situation where the wrong tactics would be a disaster, both ethically and in terms of our security. Bombs always seemed to me a blunt instrument for military actions that pretend to "surgical precision." So I assert my democratic right to question the tactics of the Commander-in-chief, and I assert my existential right to declare my total uncertainty about what the right tactics are at this moment. If I were President I wouldn't have that luxury, but I'm not, so I do. You too.

Beyond these tactical considerations, I don't trust the Bushies' motivations. I don’t trust them to act in the best interests of humanity and America . . . never mind a dissident weirdo like me. Already, the attack on what's left of our civil liberties is under way. And the Pentagon is ripping us off for more money . . .

(Parenthetical rant . . . Do you mean to tell me that $300 Billion or so a year in military expenditures is not enough money to go after an enemy consisting of a few tens of thousands of stateless desert dwellers supported by one guy worth less than Bill Gates dream home, plus whatever riches come from being on the shit end (poppy growing) of the heroin trade? We spend more on defense than the next five nations combined, but we can’t use what we already have to go after an enemy the relative size of a mosquito? Does any thinking person, for one second, believe that our technology-heavy military is going to effectively eliminate a sneaky desert mosquito if it just has 40, or 80 or $100 billion. After telling us for twenty years that common folks can't "throw money" at problems, like not being able to pay rent or Doctor's bills, we're suddenly going to be made safe by giving the Pentagon and our failing intelligence agencies more money?)

If history is any indicator, surely some time in the future, if we're lucky enough to get there, we will confront evidence of Bushie neglect for our safety and freedom in this "war." Just like the victims of Gulf War Syndrome or the people in the Washington Subway system who were the unwitting tests of an early bio-war experiment by our own military, we will get yet another opportunity to understand that whatever actions our government might take, it's never about protecting us.

Thou Doth Protest Too Much

OK. So since I'm saying, "bombs are a blunt instrument," why not join the anti-war protests. Well, at the risk of being obvious, somebody did just blow a fucking hole in New York City, and it is apparently the same bunch that had declared war on us. This is some serious shit. This one is different, and it behooves dissidents not to be predictable and reactive. Also, I have to admit the possibility that the Bushies might be choosing the best alternative in a Hobson's choice. I have to consider that nothing short of shutting down the Taliban regime in Afghanistan can begin to root out a genuine threat, and that nothing short of bombs can defeat the Taliban. Additionally, I have to admit that there's a pretty good chance that the Afghan people – particularly the women – will be better off if we defeat the Taliban with few civilian casualties. It would be difficult for the Afghanis to do much worse than the extended rule of the Taliban. Ironically, the role model here might be our old enemies, the Vietnamese, who finally invaded Cambodia to get rid of Pol Pot, whose horror show was spilling over into neighboring countries.

A Rally For the Perplexed

So here am I; neutral, stuck-in-neutral, neutered . . . not even stuck in the middle with Bill and Al, but trapped in right field with Dubya and Herr Ashcroft busy making plans for his own version of the Spanish Inquisition, unable to join the antiwar protests with a clear conscience because they could be wrong, not able to fly the flag because I don't believe in nationalism, not able to endorse the "war" because it could be a dumb tactic leading to pointless deaths, unwilling to sacrifice my irony and foolish irreverence to the martial mood of the country or to a bizarre and pious import from the 13th Century.

Do you feel like I do?

Perhaps we neutrals should join together. We can hold public cry-ins. We can carry picket signs that say "Not sure," "Utterly confused," and "It's just sad." Maybe not.

Maybe it's time to turn on, tune out, and drop way down deep inside ourselves, quietly, solemnly, into a private search for meaning. After all, if it's all downhill from here – if we're all going down slow, it would be a lot more dignified to go down in a meditation posture, or clutching a Beckett play, than bellowing "USA! USA! USA!" like some WWF ape. I mean, many Americans responded to the situation by purchasing guns. They're gonna shoot 'em down some anthrax! Well, everybody has to find his or her comfort level, I guess.

Not-knowing is true knowledge.
Presuming to know is a disease.
First realize that you are sick.
Then you can move toward health.
~~ Lao Tzu